Lifestyle & Culture

God Got the Message

October 11, 2020



I HAVE always believed in God. Not a He or a She but an It; the form of Our Heavenly Father has changed over the years.  As a child and well into my teens I truly believed that God was the Ocean, or rather that the Ocean was God. That explained its deep and unknowable mystery and the fact that it covers the globe. Nothing else goes everywhere, except of course the Sky.

So then I started thinking the Sky was God. Perched high above all of us it sees everything, sort of like Santa Claus. You can’t hide from the Sky. Yup, the Sky must be God. Or maybe Nature —could Nature be God? After all, they call it Mother Nature for a reason. Whatever, God is certainly not some old man with a beard wearing a white robe, like in all the cartoons.

Or is He? I am now convinced that whatever God is, He, She or It can read, has a very long reading list, and my blog is on it. I believe this because  I recently wrote a post concerning the horrible spider living outside my kitchen door that’s been there for a month or so, tormenting me every day. I have shied way from watering the flowers on which its web was spun, and thus they are not doing too well. I got the willies whenever I looked out there, and the quality of my life was negatively impacted by its very existence several times a day.

My post was all about that spider. I went outside this morning to check on how ugly it still was and it was gone. Vanished. Packed up its things and left, leaving no trace. Not a shred of a web anywhere.

So I concluded that either God read that post and took pity on me, or else that spider has ESP—I don’t think spiders can read — and somehow got the vibe it was hated and moved on. Either way, it’s pretty damn weird if you ask me. Not that I’m complaining. In fact, in case God is reading this post right now I would like to say that I am deeply grateful, that I love Him even more today than yesterday, and I will try to live up to His (or Her or Its) highest expectations of me.

—Andrea Rouda

Andrea Rouda blogs at The Daily Droid

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