MY NAME is Andrea and I am a loner. I don’t mind it most of the time, although it’s hard to order a large pizza or take advantage of group rates on vacations.
I know what you’re thinking: “Uh oh, look out.” I can’t blame you, because the only time loners make the news is when they go on shooting sprees. Loners have bad reputations because of this. Everyone who ever did anything remotely nutty is said to have been a loner. Hitler for sure. The guy who shot John Lennon. This is unfair. I know many friendly people who are almost never alone, yet are still quite batty and prone to violence.
Personally, I have never shot anyone. I have never owned a gun or held a gun or wanted a gun or wanted to shoot anyone. In fact, these days I hardly ever see anyone to shoot—that’s how alone I am most of the time. What I do instead is paint lovely pictures and glue beads onto things (see photo) and paint furniture. All that is hardly newsworthy, although if I were not a loner these things would never get done. That’s the side of loner life you never hear about.
The worst thing about being a loner is that there’s nobody to share it with. There’s no Loner’s Club or Loner.com. This is a bit of a drag, since it would be nice to compare notes every once in awhile with others of my ilk on how they spend their time. So I may start a club for loners. We won’t have meetings—I’m thinking weekly, but maybe monthly if not having them weekly is too burdensome. There will not be a magazine or any dues. Membership will be completely private. In fact, I may already have a lot of members and just not know.
Andrea Rouda blogs at The Daily Droid.