TWO DAYS ago I returned home to a label stuck on my door saying that FedEx had “tried to deliver” a package but nobody was home. A check mark was in the box saying they would attempt to deliver it again the next day. There was also a space where you could say you released them of responsibility and they could leave the package at the door. I checked that box and signed it because I knew I would be out much of the following day.
So the next afternoon I returned home and found the same label, with my signature, stuck on the door again. This time the driver had scrawled the message, “Can’t leave package, would be FIRED!!!” It said I could retrieve the package at a location 20 miles away, on the far side of Portland.
I found the whole thing odd because we often get package deliveries from FedEx left at our door, so I called the number of the pick-up location. A nice woman said the sender had requested an in-person drop-off and signature. I said that like many people I know I often leave home and go out to do things, and so could not guarantee anyone would be home to accept it. Armed with this seemingly surprising information, she put me on hold for half an eternity, during which time I repeatedly was told via a recorded message how important my call was to them.
The woman returned and said that if I wanted, the package could be taken to a FedEx facility nearer my home. I said great. It turned out to be 1.3 miles away. (Yeah, better than a 40-mile round-trip to get it.) We agreed that I would hear from them when the package was there. Ten minutes later another woman called and said it would be at the facility by 10:30am today.
But when I went to get it around noon, it wasn’t there. I was told that today’s delivery had already been made. I don’t even want the damn package.
—Andrea Rouda blogs at TThe Daily Droid.