Lifestyle & Culture

Another, Better Donald

January 15, 2017

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Donald Sutherland in Invasion of the Body Snatchers

I HATE ADVERTISING.  Despise it, abhor it, detest it and all the rest of the words that mean the same thing. This may stem from my earliest days as a graphic designer when I actually worked in one of those windowless cubbies in an advertising agency in Washington, DC, selling can’t-remember-what to God-knows-who. Regardless of the origin of my dislike, I now mute all ads on TV and pay not the slightest attention to them in print. Naturally they don’t work on me. Except for one.

I should be embarrassed to admit it but I switched from Tropicana, after switching from Florida’s Best, to Simply Orange juice, all because of Donald Sutherland’s voice. As a longtime fan of the actor, I saw every film he ever made until those Hunger Games in 2014 and 2015—after all, I have my standards: I want him young and handsome and sweet, not a malevolent old tyrant orchestrating death. Without Young Donald I was bereft! His son Kiefer only poured salt in the wound, looking like his father but not nearly as special, and so I never watched his hit TV show about 24 hours or something like that.

Basically my life was totally and sadly Sutherland-less, until one day I suddenly realized, hearing a commercial I hadn’t muted in time, that Donald was doing the talking! And he sounded so honest, so pure, so un-commercial-sellouty, that I ran right out and bought some of that juice and found out Donald was right: It really is simply orange juice, no additives or preservatives and not from concentrate, and it tastes like you are on a beach in Florida! Now I am a permanent customer, and I turn up the volume on those OJ ads.

Young Donald was the greatest! Here are some of his most memorable movies; if you haven’t seen them, get started:

Klute
Don’t Look Now
M*A*S*H
Invasion of the Body Snatchers
Ordinary People
Six Degrees of Separation
Max Dugan Returns
The Day of the Locust
The Dirty Dozen

—Andrea Rouda
Andrea Rouda blogs at The Daily Droid



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