Fashion & Beauty

The Case for Coats of Many Colors

A FEW MONTHS ago I suggested the pick-me-up value of adding color to a mostly black-clothing-filled closet. And now I’d like to mention that the same principle should apply to winter coats. Just look around you—everyone bundled up in black and charcoal gray, looking a lot like crows. Several years ago I asked a Neiman Marcus saleswoman why all the coats in her department were black. She remarked somewhat facetiously that that’s what buyers think women want. If it’s the only color offered, what’s the choice? Looking around a coffee shop filled with women blanketed in black, a friend recently lamented, “Why not something in raspberry?”

Art Director Kathy Legg, who looks splendid in colors, is not surprisingly anti-black coat. Associate Editor Mary Carpenter has specific reasons for opposing dark coats—the main one being that she has an orange cat. “But also, people take them from coat piles with my car keys in them.” And don’t get her started on black sweaters:  “I have left a trail on planes and trains, in movie theaters and restaurants; I’m planning never to buy another one!”

Luckily, this season, there are options. For fall 2018, designers sprang for jewel tones and spring pastels, so there’s still a chance to change your coat color. But we advise acting fast to score one of these coats of color. The January sales are on, and the items below are going fast or only available in limited sizes.

—Janet Kelly

 

LEFT: Look glam without giving up your environmental values. Apparis’ Sarah jacket is made from faux fur, features a cozy funnel neck and is fully lined in satin, a plus for ensuring a smooth shape when layering over heavy knits. $310 at modaoperandi. RIGHT: Calvin Klein’s Long Packable Puffer Coat  with hood, jacket combines insulated warmth with practical, packable design. And you can’t beat the $99.95 price tag at Lord & Taylor. Besides plum, it’s also available in lilac and silver, in addition to the usual dark suspects.

LEFT: The paprika color of Mackage’s Double-Face Wool Trench Coat speaks power. Just ask Nancy Pelosi, who wore a similar coat just a few weeks back. Unfortunately, this color is sold out, except for extra small. It’s still available in a pale pink. $750, Neiman Marcus. RIGHT: Brave enough for neon yellow? If so, you won’t have to fuss over what you put on under Tibi’s Luxe Faux Fur Oversized Coat. We should mention that this gray dress shown here looks smashing with yellow. Originally $695, it’s now $348 at Shopspring.

LEFT: We’re wild about the slate blue color of H&M’s soft and fluffy lined faux fur jacket with patch front pockets. It coordinates beautifully with jeans. When to wear? For everyday errands. $49.99, H&M.  RIGHT: If you’re nostalgic for your your old lumber jacket or blanket, take cover in Ganni’s McKinney Checked Brushed-Felt Coat. $540, Net a Porter.

 

LEFT: Nothing bad can happen at Tiffany’s or while wearing Vince’s cloud-blue Long Hair Faux Fur Coat.  We like the juxtaposition of the menswear-inspired shape with the pastel color. $695, ShopspringRIGHT: Not just any brown coat, Marni’s Coat in Brown Felted Double-Knit Wool features a bright orange leather contrast trim. It’s reduced to $1,600 from $3,200, Marni.

 

LEFT: Fashion label Agnes B. is beloved by French women. This slightly flared Alex Wool Coat with simple, elegant lines epitomizes French-girl looks. It’s $497 at Agnes BRIGHT: Hesitant to wear pink, purple or neon yellow? Venture slowly out of your comfort zone in Eileen Fisher’s Suri Alpaca Blend Coat in pine. It’s $698, Nordstrom.

LEFT: Go ahead, brave the elements in this rose-mauve Park City Puffer. Filled with lightweight goose down, it’s designed to deliver warmth to -22°F. The shell is made with Japanese ripstop fabric that’s water repellent. $199, Aritzia.  RIGHT: Italian brand Pinko is known for its high-quality fabrics and off-the-beaten track looks, like this   nude-colored, oversized shearling.  Wear with leggings and sneakers or a sequin dress. It’s $785 at Matches Fashion.

 

 

LEFT: Feel sassy and pretty, too, in Sportmax’s pink shearling-effect Sella mohair-blend  coat.  It’s mad of a rich mohair blend so you should feel warm, too, as you add a fun dash of color to your winter look. By the way, it’s reduced from $2,625 to $1,050 at Matches Fashion. RIGHT: The oversized, slouchy silhouette of this wool-blend blanket coat from Matches Fashion in-house brand Raey makes it the ideal item for wrapping yourself up in but not hiding. Not in this saturated blue hue. $907, Matches Fashion.

 

MyLittleBird often includes links to products we write about. Our editorial choices are made independently; nonetheless, a purchase made through such a link can sometimes result in MyLittleBird receiving a commission on the sale, whether through a retailer, an online store or Amazon.com.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Apps to Die For

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I TITLED this post just to be funny because it’s about phone apps, and the first one I’ll discuss is WeCroak. My husband, who is basically obsessed with the subject, loves this one, although I do not. I tell him I already know I’m going to die, I don’t need five daily reminders, thank you very much. But I get them anyway because whenever one pops up, Mitch reacts audibly, usually with a groan. Naturally this prompts me to ask him what’s wrong, to which he replies, “I’m going to die someday.” Keeping this knowledge in the forefront of your mind is supposed to enhance the quality of one’s life, but based on Mitch’s increasingly gloomy disposition, it doesn’t. You can do what you want of, course, but I’d steer clear of this one.

On a happier note, there are some apps I heartily endorse. A short list of my favorites follows, and I do mean short —in 2018 there were roughly 2 million apps available to download.

1. Shazam: This app finds the name and artist of any music that’s playing within earshot, keeping you from going nuts wondering who’s the artist or what’s the title. Out in a restaurant, or anywhere there’s music playing, you simply hold your phone up in the air and, with enough time, the answer appears. So if the song is, “Baby, It’s Cold Outside,” you can find out what sexist is singing it and then complain to the management to turn it off.

2. HQ Trivia: Daily at 3 and 9pm, there’s a fun game to play where you might even win money! Despite my mini-addiction, I’ve never won a dime. There are only ten seconds to answer each of 12 increasingly difficult questions, which means not enough time to Google it. You’re competing with roughly 500,000 others to split the $5,000 prize, although sometimes the pot is $25,000. The best part, besides learning esoteric stuff you never knew, is the game’s emcee Scott Rogowski. He’s a gifted comic who is beyond hysterical and definitely reason enough to log in.

3. Pandora: Basically this is free radio, tailored to your personal tastes. You plug in a song or an artist you like, and it creates a channel just for you. About a quarter of the selections will be the named artist or group, and the rest will be others with a similar sound.

4. Venmo:  If you’re short on cash, have lost your credit card, or for some reason find yourself penniless, you can still pay for your dinner. Just have your companion pay and Venmo your share. This app transfers money directly from your bank account into another in as little as ten minutes. (Yes, both parties need the app.)

5. Calm:  Meditation is bigger than ever these days, but some poor souls remain unenlightened. It’s hard to factor doing nothing at all into a busy schedule, thereby letting another day of mindlessness slip by. But Calm tells you exactly how, when and where to ascend to a higher level of consciousness.

6. Map My Fitness:  How far did you run? Or walk, or bike? And where did you go? You might want to know, and just by turning on this app when you go out to exercise, you’ll have the information (shown on a map) at your fingertips when you get home. Then you can show your route to your friends and family, or if you’re even more self-absorbed, post it on Facebook. (Another app of course, but you knew that.)

7. Open Table:  Absolutely the easiest way to plan a dinner out, Open Table saves you the frustration of calling restaurant after restaurant and being told there’s no room at the inn, or that there’s room, but not when you want to go. Instead, you are presented with a list of eateries that can accommodate your party with the times that are open. Most restaurants in most big cities have registered with this app, but some haven’t so you might still have to go it alone for someplace especially esoteric.

8. Waze:  Offering a navigation system based on real-time information concerning traffic in your area at the moment, this app is a must-have for getting to the airport in rush hour or embarking on road trips in unfamiliar territory. But be brave: To escape the jams and reach your destination, Waze takes you down secret paths, back alleys and dirt roads. It can be scary sometimes, but you’ll get there, and ahead of everyone stuck on the Interstate.

9. The Weather Channel: You know what this one is, and you probably already have it. In case you don’t, what are you waiting for? It’s essential for anyone who is planning travel to another city, or even just going outdoors where they live.

10. The Moon:  Great for vampires (for obvious reasons), this app is also just plain fun if you’re fascinated by the moon. Is it waxing? Is it waning? When will it be a full moon? These are things some unusual people want to know. My husband is one of them, because even though he will die someday, he’s very interested in the phases of the moon while he’s still alive.

11. Tides Near Me: Any boaters out there? If so, you need this one. Check to see when the tides will be high or low and avoid getting trapped on some low-lying island in the middle of the bay, or ocean, or whatever tidal waters you frequent.

12. Words With Friends:  What—you don’t play Words With Friends? Surely you jest. What do you do when your plane is delayed? Or sitting at the orthodontist while junior is getting those braces adjusted? Or just about anytime and anywhere there’s nothing else to do? You could turn on Calm (see # 5) and reach nirvana, or you could play WWF and avoid getting Alzheimer’s. Studies like the one done by Cambridge University suggest that word games boost the memory and may reduce the risk of dementia.  It’s your choice, along with the more than 57 million other folks playing at any moment, according to Michelle David, the app’s lead experience designer.

 

—Andrea Rouda

Andrea Rouda blogs at The Daily Droid

Have a Jolly Holiday

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WE’RE SETTLING down for a long winter nap. We’ll be up and about on Jan. 7, 2019.

(Mostly) Fashionable Stocking Stuffers

OH, WHAT FUN it is to open a bunch of small, precious packages. Which is why we love hunting for (and receiving!) stocking-stuffer mini-presents. No pressure to make sure it’s the gift of anyone’s dreams. Just a little joy wrapped up and dropped into a funny-looking stocking.

The National Museum of Women in the Arts’ very first fashion exhibit is a retrospective of the arty clothing of designers Kate and Laura Mulleavy. Their 13-year-old luxury label is known by Rodarte (a variation on their mother’s maiden name, Rodart). If you can’t make it to the show, the museum shop is selling a book of paper dolls ($36). Wouldn’t your niece just love to dress up the sister duo in a total of 12 different looks?

 

LEFT: A little high on the hog for a stocking stuffer, but fans of Fornasetti will swoon for this Labbra Scented Candle ($195). Although they’ll have to wait because a note from the Amara website says it won’t be in stock again until Jan. 8.  Maybe for Valentine’s Day? RIGHT: We first noticed Mackenzie-Childs’ Courtly Check moose a few years ago when the company introduced it as a centerpiece. We couldn’t be happier that it has now popped up as a Moose Bottle Stopper. For a stylish host. It’s $32 at Mackenzie-Childs.

LEFT: For your friend who can never keep track of where her glasses are. Anthropologie’s Colloquial Glasses Case will be a timely reminder and a fun way to protect a favorite pair of specs. $20, Anthropologie. RIGHT: Wouldn’t this Eye-Black Matchbox be the perfect match for the Fornasetti candle shown above? Or for that matter, anyone’s cocktail table in need of a little graphic whimsy. $4, John Derian.

Among Peter Carl Fabergé’s elite clientele were the last two czars of the Romanov family, for whom he crafted  Easter eggs in rare gems and precious metals. For a close-up look at the real Imperial Easter eggs, head to D.C.’s Hillwood Museum for the exhibit “Fabergé Rediscovered. In the meantime, someone on your list might be thrilled with these Russian Imperial Mini Egg Ornaments. $60 for six at the Metropolitan Museum of Art shop.

LEFT: Made of beeswax, jojoba oil and tree resin, Bee’s Wrap Lunch Pack is the eco-friendly alternative to sealing sandwiches and such with plastic. Save the oceans; give it to everyone. $21, Amazon. RIGHT:  Undeniably preppy and practical, these knit Bow Tech Gloves will let your pal keep on texting, no matter how low the Fahrenheit dips. Also available in white and black, $36, Tuckernuck.

LEFT:  Who doesn’t need a little off-screen time? Little Puzzle Thing™ jigsaws are miniature puzzles that can be completed in 20 minutes or less. The Food series (which also includes a New York slice, papaya, eggplant and birthday cake)  is a timed edition, printed in limited quantities. Little Puzzle Thing – Brocoli, $15, Areaware.  RIGHT: These hand-painted solid milk chocolate lipsticks are sold out. But you can still make someone smile with a dark chocolate and salted caramel martini glass and a white-chocolate pimento olive from Maggie Louise’s Happy Hour Chocolate Gift Box. $16, Neiman Marcus.

 

 

LEFT: Maybe a bit more of an “important” gift than a stocking stuffer, these Surprise Earrings from Reliquia (named for the word meaning family heirloom in Spanish) will suit your sister who likes the look of vintage. $145, ShopbopRIGHT: A quartet of star-crossed ladies on this decoupage Les Nebuleuses Plate with velvet backing is the perfect place to corral one’s jewelry after a night out—and to find it again the next day. $50, Catbird.

 —Janet Kelly

 

MyLittleBird often includes links to products we write about. Our editorial choices are made independently; nonetheless, a purchase made through such a link can sometimes result in MyLittleBird receiving a commission on the sale, whether through a retailer, an online store or Amazon.com.

Obsessed

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CERTAINLY THERE are better and worse things one might become addicted to, but I have never met anyone who is not addicted to something. Have you? I recently heard an expert—some sort of psychologist—assert that these days children as young as two show signs of addiction to their toys and games. He added that the average child acquires a cell phone at age 10. After that he or she abandons the felt world and enters a virtual reality where they will stay until their death or loss of their phone, whichever comes first.

Over the years my personal addictions have changed. The earliest one was dieting. This was the result of having a mother who was a former dancer who ate like a bird and weighed about as much. Then, too, my older sister got fat as a form of rebellion and stayed that way, giving me a front row seat at the eternal passion play, The Misery of Obesity. I dieted from the age of 12, in between compulsive and binge eating. I did Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, oh, who cares. You get the idea.

My next addiction was running; that was a fun one. I did it six days a week in all sorts of weather. The best part was that I could eat anything I wanted and never gain weight! I didn’t stop until one of my hips all but disintegrated, requiring a fake one to be installed. These days I am addicted to writing this blog, then reading it and rereading it. And then editing it. But hey, it’s not damaging to my health, unless you count the health of my marriage. I require my husband to read it every day, and when he doesn’t I’m annoyed, or worse.

Other popular addictions I happily do not have include alcohol, heroin, opioids, prescription drugs (although I do love my lorazepam, possibly too much), nicotine, cocaine, crystal meth, gambling, sex, food, shopping, playing video games, mindlessly checking cell phones, scrolling Facebook, watching YouTube, watching reality TV, having plastic surgery and shoplifting. For reasons not yet understood, nobody is addicted to cleaning public bathrooms, helping strangers in need, preparing healthy home-cooked meals, picking up litter from the streets, stopping to talk to the homeless or reflecting on our inevitable death. Those would be some pretty good ones to have.

—Andrea Rouda
Andrea Rouda blogs at The Daily Droid.

Party-Ready Tops

WITH APOLOGIES for the buzz kill, we’re less than two weeks away from the shortest day of the year. So it’s no wonder we’re chasing the light, whether from the tinsel of Christmas trees or the glow of burning candles. And that same principle applies to us, as well as our homes. The more light reflected on our faces, the better we look—and feel, too. You’re thinking jewelry, right? Always a good idea, but another option in this season of parties is shirts, blouses and sweaters with their own sparkle and shine. Here, 13 suggestions with plenty of shimmer.

 

LEFT: When you’re tired (quelle horreur!) of that little sleeveless black sheath, change the look with a swingy, cape-like sequin top. $99.99 from Mango.  RIGHT: Who needs a lot of jewelry when your sequin sweater sparkles all on its own? $69, Zara

LEFT: Leopard is forever, at least this year.  We’re especially fond of its subtle look in metallic on Equipment’s Tie-Neck Long-Sleeve Burnout Blouse. Dress it up with velvet tuxedo pants or down with skinny leather ones. $330, Neiman Marcus. RIGHT: A dazzling crystal brooch on the neckline lights up Dodo Bar Or’s Veronica Polka Dot Fil-Coupé Blouse. Up the opulence factor. Wear it with slim satin trousers. $553, Matches.

 

LEFT: A puff sleeve on Ulla Johnson’s Raw Sequin Blouse will work for glamour girls who want to tone down the seriousness of sequins. $495,  Nordstrom. MIDDLE: How to take an office-appropriate button-down to a blouse worthy of a festive night out? Make it in metallic. L’Agence’s Nina Knit Metallic Blouse is $425, Saks Fifth Avenue. RIGHT: Don’t you just hate it when one of your favorites sells out? Alas, that’s the case with Topshop’s adorable Rainbow Bow Blouse with metallic sparkle. Check out alternatives at Nordstrom.

LEFT: Save money on spendy gems. The embellished cuffs stand in for jewels on this sheer, blouson-sleeved Alice + Olivia Vix Top. Reduced to $330 from $440. Limited sizes. Neiman Marcus. RIGHT: Not all fancy tops need to be black. Case in point: Velvet by Graham & Spencer’s peach-colored Brighton Blouse, dripping with sequin icicles. $257, Anthropologie.

LEFT: Wear this semi-sheer Top With Metallic Thread day or night. As shown above, over a black turtleneck for some daytime shine or by itself for after-dark chic. $39.90, ZaraRIGHT: Thanks to the curved hem on Rixo London’s Sequinned Pussy Bow Blouse, you can wear it in or out. For the adventurous, pair it with a print skirt. $171, Farfetch.

LEFT: The metallic silver polka dots on Diane von Furstenberg’s Larryn Silver Spot Wrap Top are all you need to shine for an evening out. Plus, those puffed sleeves put the emphasis on that small waist of yours. The flowing waist ties add attitude. Always a good thing. $398, Matches. RIGHT: Can’t make up your mind whether you’re feeling bohemian or glam? Iro’s Metallic Tie-Neck Blouse combines a little boho with a little glitz. $278, Nordstrom.

—Janet Kelly

 

MyLittleBird often includes links to products we write about. Our editorial choices are made independently; nonetheless, a purchase made through such a link can sometimes result in MyLittleBird receiving a commission on the sale, whether through a retailer, an online store or Amazon.com.

 

 

How to Banish Dry Skin

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Winter has arrived and with it, itchy, scaly, dry skin. Ugh. That’s why we thought it was a good time to rerun this post on how to keep a parched epidermis moist.  

THE PHD’S at cosmetics companies will discuss at length the scientific principles behind their expensive lotions and such for dry skin.  But ever since a university-based dermatologist recommended the cheap and simple combination of mineral oil and lanolin, I’ve concocted my own potion.

More than 30 years later, I’ve made only a few alterations like dropping in a little almond oil after friends described the odor as somewhere between sheep and urine. For a reason I can’t remember I switched from mineral oil to vaseline petroleum jelly and added a few glops of some commercial preparation like Lubriderm or Eucerin to more easily mix in the heavy lanolin.

Although most friends brave enough to sample the brew find it too greasy, nothing has worked better for me. That’s particularly so during long winters of long, hot baths and showers (ill-advised for those with dry skin) but mostly dry air, despite regular efforts to increase indoor humidity.

Still, I continue to experiment with alternatives—for the hoped-for ease of ordering online as well as for saving tired hands.  With their temptingly natural nickname, “barnyard balms,” used to prevent cows’ udders from chapping, turned out to moisten and soften farmers’ hands.  But because most people find Bag Balm greasy and smelly and Udder Cream unappealing because it contains urea, I tried the more popular Udderly Smooth, with instructions to “wash udder and teat parts” and the warning, “Do not use on parts affected with cow pox.”  It failed to restore my skin’s moisture.

Moisture is delivered to the skin via blood vessels that supply the skin’s middle layer, the dermis; from there it travels upward through the outer level, the epidermis, a bricks-and-mortar type membrane that acts as a hydrophobic barrier— before evaporating.  The dryer the air because of low outdoor temperatures and overheated interiors, the more moisture it pulls from the skin. (The third and lowest level of skin is the hypodermis or fatty layer.)

Dry, flaky skin or xerosis (officially when the skin’s moisture level is less than 10%) occurs when the water-retaining abilities of the top layer of skin are lost.  To stay moist, what the skin needs is the unlikely sounding combination of oil and water: moisturizers work best when applied after bathing —when the water is already there —after the skin is blotted but not rubbed dry.

“Applying an oily substance to the skin without also resupplying it with water…is ineffective: you’d just end up with greasy skin that is still dry and cracked,” according to the Harvard Health Letter. “One reason for the proliferation of moisturizers is the continuing search for a mix of ingredients that holds in water like petrolatum but feels nicer on the skin.”

But there is no consensus regarding the definition of a moisturizer…a neologism coined by Madison Avenue,” according to dermatology researcher Anishi Sethi.

Traditionally, oily materials were applied to the skin “to inhibit trans-epidermal water loss (TEWL)” by replacing the lost barrier.

Such oily materials—notably mineral oils and petrolatum—diffuse into the intercellular levels where they help bolster the bricks-and-mortar structure and form an evaporation-blocking barrier. Within this category of moisturizers called occlusives, petroleum jelly has a “water vapor loss resistance” 170 times that of olive oil and reduces TEWL by more than 98%, compared to lanolin and mineral oils at 20 to 30%.

Humectants, another category, work by attracting moisture to the skin and keeping it there—“basically the opposite of occlusive and emollients which don’t like water” from outside sources,” writes Julia Calderone at Business Insider.

“But beware,” says Calderone. “In dry conditions, humectants can draw moisture from the younger, moist cells in the lower layers of the skin instead of pulling moisture from the air.  Minimize this by pairing a humectant with an occlusive, which keeps the moisture in.”

The third category, emollients, include their own water and “penetrate the skin making it feel soft and flexible,” she explains.  Depending on the amount of water added, emollients range from lotions to creams to ointments: for lotions, water is the base with vaseline added; creams contain a little more added vaseline; and ointments start with vaseline mixed with a little mineral oil to lessen the stickiness.

Adding water, however, increases the likelihood of spoiling, requiring the addition of preservatives.  And “since preservatives can stink, we add fragrances to mask the unpleasant smell…the more water content a product contains, the more likely it is for bacteria to form, so the higher the preservative and fragrance content,” according to Dermatology Alliance —which is why ointments can be easier on sensitive skin as well as less likely to go bad.

In addition to udder creams, home remedies include the familiar pairing of vinegar and olive oil, usually one or the other.  In “The People’s Pharmacy,” by Joe and Terry Graedon, one contributor dips her hands in a solution of two-thirds white vinegar and one-third water for two minutes and then rinses.  Noting the lack of supporting science, “The People’s Pharmacy” authors suggest “vinegar restores balance to dry skin caused by too much hand washing.”

Although “it may be a little greasy,” rubbing olive oil on skin and hair is also considered an “effective moisturizer” by “The People’s Pharmacy.” And it can appeal to dogs who like licking oily skin.

In one rating system assessing the 10 most popular lotions, the “hands-down” vote went to Aveeno Daily Moisturizing Lotion.  The runner up was CeraVe Moisturizing Lotion, which is “even lighter than our pick…more expensive due to ‘healing’ ingredients even though research suggests they make little difference.”

For drier skin, dermatology sites recommend oils, including Neutrogena Light Sesame Oil and Alpha-Keri Oil.  The most anecdotally well liked, however, and the one I use as a backup is Aquaphor Advanced Therapy Healing Ointment; and for lips, the Repair and Protect Lip Balm.

—Mary Carpenter

Every Tuesday Mary Carpenter reports on well-being, answering questions about living longer, the dangers of heavy metals and therapy with psychedelics.

12 Tips to Improve Your Conversations

Susan Morris has spoken to everyone from sex addicts to convicted murderers to U.S. senators.

 

 

HAVE YOU ever thought that some people are just natural conversationalists? No matter whom they’re talking to, no matter the topic, they seem relaxed and comfortable. I used to envy their skills—I wanted people to listen to me and ask me questions. It took some time, but gradually I learned several different techniques for making conversation (and me) more interesting.

Now that the holiday season is at full tilt, you’ll likely find yourself in situations where knowing how to keep the conversation going will come in handy. Here, a dozen talking points:

1) Learn to listen. To some people, listening means planning what they are going to say when the other person stops talking. Real listening means focusing on what the other person is saying. One way to stay engaged is to respond to what they’re saying:  “What you’ve  just said is interesting. Please tell me more about that.” Or “Excuse me.  Can you explain that again? I didn’t quite get it.”

2) Redirect the conversation. Some people talk non-stop.  One effective way to interrupt is to interject questions, such as “What got you so interested in this in the first place?”   “Why are you doing this now?” Another technique is to preface your questions with comments, such as “I’ve never understood the intrigue of visiting Siberia. I’d much prefer to see another part of Russia.  Why did you decide to go there?” Before you know it, you are having a conversation that’s interesting to you.

3) Smile and make eye contact. We are drawn to people who appear to be in a good mood and are open to meeting others. Making eye contact is another signal that shows interest and self-confidence. That doesn’t mean staring into someone’s eyes.  You only need to make contact for 5 to 8 seconds before looking away.  By making eye contact again, you show continuing interest.

4) Assume rapport. By acting as though you are talking to a friend, you’re signaling that you like them and are interested in them. That makes people more likely to respond to your openness by opening up in return. You establish a connection.  You then can tell your story, tailoring it to correspond with the other person’s interests.

5) Watch the way you talk. Make it easy for people to hear and understand you. Speak clearly.  Enunciate your words.  Speak with emotion.  Do people tell you to repeat something you’ve said?  Take the hint!  It means you need to speak up and probably slow down.

6) Improve your delivery. An energetic voice, along with pauses and expressive facial expressions,  does wonders for a conversation.  Remember, it is not what you say, but how you say it.

7) Remember three words: What?  How?  Why? If you add them to your conversations, you will be amazed by how much more you learn.   Also, by asking for explanations, opinions and descriptions, you have a chance to redirect the conversation.

8) Be entertaining. Telling a good joke can break the ice or clear any tension. (Keep your joke or story short and practice telling it.) Stay away from stories about badly behaved children and annoying in-laws. Avoid talking about personal problems.  People have enough of their own.

9) Be curious! Before you go to a social occasion, read up on what’s in the news, sports highlights, weather forecasts.  Become familiar with trends in your community.  Ask for opinions on the subject.  This all can be fodder for a good conversation.

10) Avoid controversial subjects.  Save your political discussions for like-minded friends. Don’t argue, even when the other person wants to. If the conversation continues to go down hill, simply excuse yourself. You are under no obligation to engage in a heated exchange.

11) Develop a range of small-talk topics. Talk about a fun trip you’ve taken, a good movie you’ve seen, an exciting book you’ve just finished. Remember, make sure it’s not all about you.  End your comments by asking questions about the other person’s favorite trip or most recently read book.

12) Don’t monopolize the time. Forty-five seconds is a good parameter.  If you lose track and suspect you’re talking too much, just look at the other person’s eyes.  If they are wandering, looking down or worse yet, closed, chances are you’ve talked too much. Stop and ask a question.

A good conversation is a wonderful tonic. Listening well, asking pertinent questions and engaging with friends and strangers give you exposure to new ideas and different attitudes.  Life becomes much richer.  Can’t beat that!

—Susan Morris
Susan Morris was a freelance reporter/producer for several news organizations, including NPR. She currently teaches “The Art of Conversation” for the Osher Lifelong Learning Institute at Carnegie Mellon. 

Window Wonders in NYC

NO MATTER how old you are, New York City’s holiday windows never fail to make you feel like a kid again. Or eke out a smile from even the crustiest among us.

Not heading to NYC this Christmas? Thanks to MyLittleBird friend Sue Spock, you can still revel in the pleasures of window shopping (above) at Saks Fifth Avenue and Bergdorf Goodman’s.

 

Account Insecurity

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EARLIER TODAY, wanting to write a post in this very space, I accidentally clicked the wrong thing on my computer and I was locked out of my blog. It turned out to be worse than being locked out of my house, which has happened to me more than once. All I had to do in each of those instances was open a window. That’s a simple task here in Maine because none of our windows have locks. Any idiot can just slide them open and climb in. It was harder back in D.C., where I had to use a rock to break a pane of glass in a French door and then stick my hand inside to turn the doorknob. I got inside easily enough but immediately had to go to the ER because I had inadvertently slit my wrist doing so. I needed six stitches and endured a frantic drive to the hospital with my teenage son, unlicensed but with a learner’s permit, at the wheel. Just for fun, God threw in a severe thunderstorm enroute. Still, despite all of that, it was easier, though bloodier, than getting locked out of my blog.

First I received a message saying I no longer could access this blog. Then came the barrage of  security questions. What was my favorite pet? Jesus, that changes on a daily basis! I tried “Tank,” our adorable dead pug from years ago. Nope. Then I tried “Daisy,” my feline soul mate, also deceased. No again. Okay, what city were you born in? I found out just today that Brooklyn is not a city, it’s only a borough inside a city, that being New York City. Of course I knew that, who doesn’t, but a card laid is a card played. There are no do-overs with a computer.

By then the Google people were suspicious and requested the phone number on the account. Only it was an old one from years ago that I couldn’t remember. After entering the wrong phone number, all hell broke loose. In no time my email flooded with messages from Google saying my account was “in peril.” They sent me several sets of numbers to use to unlock it, but each time I also had to enter a password with it and it was never the right one, despite my having to create a new password each time. Finally came the message that I had tried too many times, and I would have to wait until later, when “someone will contact you.”

After a lot of time and frustration, with frantic emails to this account and that account, and numerous text messages to my cell phone sounding the alarm, I finally managed to get back in. Don’t ask me how. All I know is that throwing a rock at my computer would have been so much easier.

—Andrea Rouda

Andrea Rouda blogs at The Daily Droid

To Give and to Get

AFTER ALL the Thanksgiving hoopla, I was finding it hard to focus on that next big holiday on the calendar. In particular, I was running on empty when it came to gift ideas, let alone interesting ones. So, as I’ve often done in the past, I checked in with my fab MyLittleBird colleagues—Nancy, Mary and Kathy—for their suggestions on what to give and also what they’d like to see under the tree for themselves! Nancy found some wild pajamas; Kathy is asking Santa for Fragonard soaps and Mary is hoping someone among her family and friends wants a terrarium. Thanks for your input, team, and to Stephanie, who has already weighed in with her garden-inspired thoughts. See below for some inspiration for your own list. And, as long as you’re asking, I did come up with a few of my own ideas.

JK Adams slate cheese board from Cityscapes Collection.

JK Adams, the Vermont company of butcher-block renown, has these clever new cheese boards made of charcoal slate. We have the Washington DC skyline on ours—it’s part of the JK Adams Cityscapes Collection. There are seven other cities represented:  Boston, Chicago, Denver, New York, Philadelphia, San Francisco, Seattle. At 5 by 12 inches, they’re not humongous, but at $20 they’re a great hostess or even regular gift.

Nancy:  No, I don’t want to drink absinthe and don’t know anyone who does. But how cool will this 19th-century repro absinthe carafe look on your favorite friend’s bar cart? The Absinthe Loupe Carafe (left) is $49 at Frontgate. In olive-growing areas of Italy, where people take their olive oil seriously, they take these handsome stainless-steel containers to the local cooperative frantoio and buy their oil for the coming year. Now, I use a lot of olive oil but not this much—I just want to feel a bit more italiana. This two-liter stainless container with spigot (right) sits on a stand, is by Sansone and is $89.95 at WaterCheck.bz, which sells it as a water dispenser.

 

Kathy: There isn’t much I want, but I can always find lush throws, fancy room sprays, goofy Christmas ornaments I’d like to give to friends and family. I think once we get to our age we have just about everything we want. Certainly everything we need. And then experiences become more important than things. So I suppose if there is something I’d want it would be for Santa to spring for one of those Viking River cruises along the Danube or some other European river.

 

 

Nancy: It wasn’t until I stayed at a fancy (and traditional-minded) hotel in Istanbul that I understood what “Turkish towels” really are. They NOT the heavy, bulky things we seem to prize by weight. They’re gossamer-thin, truly absorbent cotton towels that are making themselves known here at home. Antiochia offers a wide array, different colors, different trims. Hand towels are a generous 20 x 40 inches and $18 each. The 40 x 70 -inch bath towel is $38. They’re at Antochia Home. I’d be happy to give a couple of these as gifts and would be equally happy receiving some myself.
Nancy: Am I the only person who would like vintage images of elephants stomping all over me while I sleep? Okay, then, give them to me! The elephants are rendered in indigo and black on a white ground. These Vintage Safari Pajamas (left) are $174 in sizes small, medium and large from Olive and Cocoa. Mary: Because Christmas is in the winter I like to get cozy wool and cashmere things, scarves and sweaters. Once I even got cashmere tights that I’ve relied on ever since for extremely cold days. These Natori Cashmere-Blend Sweater Tights (right) are $68, Nordstrom.
Nancy: This adorable Faux Fur Star Sweatshirt (left) from Derek Heart is great for little girls who can wear it—in pink, aqua or navy—without worrying if it makes them look fat. It’s on sale for $19.99 at Lord & Taylor. Janet: Joseph’s Stretch Leather Leggings are on my wish list. They’re a spendy $1,185 in navy, but nobody does pants better than this brand. And if I wanted them in olive green, they could be mine for $711.

Kathy: If Santa has maxed out his credit cards, there is one other thing he might consider giving me and that’s a year’s supply of my favorite Fragonard Olive Oil Botanical Soap (left). It’s the one thing I’ve splurged on since a French friend gave me a bar years ago. And now I give it to my friends, too. $19 may be a lot to spend on a bar of soap, but the lavender fragrance is divine and the dense, luxurious bar lasts a month. I usually buy six bars at a time at Fragonard. Janet: They make this Santa Maria Novella Potpourri (right) out of a mix of rosemary, clove, thyme and lavender. It supposedly smells like the Tuscan hills. I think it smells better. This bag of 100 grams is $35.

Mary: If I could think of someone besides me who likes terrariums, I would give them as gifts. This double-decker terrarium (left, note: you have to add plants yourself) is $48 from Terrain, a sibling of Anthropologie. Janet: Nothing makes coffee seem more special than when it’s topped with a foamy froth of milk. It makes Wednesday feel like Saturday. Which is why I’m so very happy with my Nespresso Aerocinno 4 Milk Frother  (right) and would be glad to give it to a very good friend. It’s $119 at Sur La Table.
Mary: I often find scarves, shawls and other accessories for friends from the Museum of Modern Art catalogue. Extra Long Touch Gloves (left) not only add valuable real estate for warmth but also allow for dextrous texting. One size fits most. $19.95 at MoMA Design Store. Nancy: Yes! Your iPhone has a flashlight so you can see where you dropped your keys. Now it can also have a protective cover that turns into a mirror when the phone is in locked mode. The Fifth & Ninth Beauty Glass is $25 or $30, depending on your iPhone model. Yay!
Nancy: Very handsome, very confusing. Not to get all gender-y about it, but I imagine women across the land fussing in the kitchen before a party while the men are very, very busy at the bar trying to infuse something with something using their new Porthole Infuser. It can be used to make infused oils, or to make flavored syrups that can become the star ingredient of a yet-to-be-named cocktail. The Porthole Infuser is $149 at Frontgate.

 

Janet: There’s a recipe in Yotam Ottolenghi’s and Sami Tamimi’s Jerusalem cookbook, Roasted Chicken With Clementines & Arak, that makes me, a so-so cook, look like a star. Ottolenghi has recently come out with a new one, Ottolenghi Simple: A Cookbook (left, $21, Amazon) that promises dishes made in 30 minutes or less with 10 or fewer ingredients and a single pot. A definite for my friends of similar cooking caliber. I have a brand-new glossy kitchen with a despicable-looking dish rack that’s old as dirt. This minimalist, Japanese-designed Wood-Handled Dish Rack (right) might even change my attitude about washing dishes. It’s $65 from Food52.

—MyLittleBird Staff

 

MyLittleBird often includes links to products we write about. Our editorial choices are made independently; nonetheless, a purchase made through such a link can sometimes result in MyLittleBird receiving a commission on the sale, whether through a retailer, an online store or Amazon.com.

 

Gobble, Gobble

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The Little Birds are off for the day, enjoying the big-bird feast. We’ll be back here Friday. In the meantime, a big thank you to our readers!

 

Talking Turkey About Holiday Sales

On sale, clockwise from left: J. Crew vintage pajamas in hydrangea, Theory leather pants, Emilio Pucci cosmetic bag and cashmere travel wrap from White + Warren.

FORGET BLACK FRIDAY and Cyber Monday, too. Stores and/or websites started their sales at the beginning of this week. The not-so-good news about that is many if not most of the discounted items you’re coveting, say on Net a Porter or Moda Operandi, are already out of stock. And the coats, boots, hats and gloves you’d like to buy right now—well, not so much of that is on sale. There are some good deals on out-of-season clothing and accessories. Although I consider sunglasses an all-year thing, there are more than 200 at various discounts on the Neiman Marcus site. If you happen to be in the market for super-trendy, the metallic gold snakeskin-effect stiletto boots with a red dragon print could be yours. They’re reduced from $1,400 to $700 on Farfetch. And, if you’re okay with Joseph’s camel gabardine leggings instead of the black ones, you can score a pair for $148 instead of $295, also on Farfetch.

Often the best discounts on clothing come in January when stores need to get rid of winter merchandise to make room for spring. Alas, by then those skinny leather pants I’ve been eying for several weeks may already be sold out.

All that considered, here are some things we plucked from among the sales we’ve been browsing.

—Janet Kelly

Dermstore Deals

LEFT: Everyone raves about Bioderma, a skin cleanser for removing makeup from face and eyes. Get it for $11.17 for 16.7 ounces when you rack up a $100 order purchase from Dermstore. Use DSTHANKS promo code. The offer is good through Thursday, Nov. 22. CENTER: I’m very tempted by the Slip Queen Pillowcase, even though it seems insanely pricey ($63.75 with discount) for a pillowcase. Anyway, if it can stop me from getting more wrinkles and bad hair days, I’m in. RIGHT: By Terry’s Terrybly Densiliss Concealer is pricey ($69), but does the job and is easy to apply to camouflage dark circles and hide dark spots.  It’s $51.75 on a $100 order purchase.

Warm and Cuddly

LEFT: I like the borrowed-from-the-boys look of  this J. Crew’Vintage Pajama Set, but most of all the crisp cotton feels both deliciously cool and soft on my skin. It’s 40 percent off its full $95 price with code TOGETHER. RIGHT: Ganni’s Callahan Mohair Sweater is just the kind of cozy knit you can duck into when the world is too much with you. And, it’s now $229.99, instead of $270 at Need Supply.

LEFT: The sporty bomber jacket goes luxe with faux fur, as in Elizabeth and James’s Faux Fur Jacket on sale at Saks Fifth Avenue.  Now $345, it’s reduced from $575.  Available, as shown above, in a teal blue, or brandy color. RIGHT: Whether you’re going to Bologna or staying put in Boston, White + Warren’s Cashmere Travel Wrap will surround you in warmth. Available in the carnelian heather (shown), as well as in sunny lemon drop, emerald and teal blue. It’s $219, reduced from $298.

LEFT: Stay trendy and toasty in this plush, padded Shelter Faux Leopard Jacket with standing, keep-the-neck-warm collar. Lined in satin, it’s reduced from $812 to $608.99 at Need Supply.  Availability in small and extra small sizes. RIGHT: Offered at half of its original $995, Co‘s wool midi-dress with attached capelet is sold out (sigh) at Moda Operandi.

 

 

 

LEFT: Warm up a gray, chilly day in the city with Missoni’s Wool-blend Crochet-knit Gloves with ribbed cuffs to keep in the warmth. They’re 30 percent off $220, $154 at Net A PorterRIGHT: Indulge your wannabe-a-French-girl with striped cuff gloves from Sonia Rykiel. On sale for $102 at Farfetch.

Leather Weather

You can’t go wrong with a pair of Theory pants. And these Five Pocket Skinny Bristol Leather Cropped Pants in forest green, now $597 (originally $995), are a good buy at Neiman Marcus. Now, if only the black or navy ones were this price ..

The Color Purple–and Pink

LEFT: I’d love to have a Pucci dress, but I’d settle for a little Pucci in the label’s bold signature print on this Quilted Silk Twill Cosmetics Case. It’s now $180, originally $360 at Moda Operandi. And instead of leaving it at home, carry it as a colorful clutch and pretend you’re on a vacation in the Mediterranean. RIGHT: Thanks to Well-Being Editor Mary Carpenter’s recent post, I’m all over the idea of having some lavender scent to calm my overactive senses. AyaZen‘s Lavender Eye Pillow ($13.95 from $19.95) also contains flax seed, and you can heat it (in the microwave), chill it (in the freezer) or just use it at room temperature.

 

 

An end-of-season sale at Tibi is slashing prices by up to 50 percent. This Merino Wool Polo Neck Pullover updates the polo silhouette in a less fitted direction with bell sleeves and rib cuffs. $225, originally $450. And the color (also available in ivory) is so darn cheery, you can stash your light box whenever you wear it.

 

MyLittleBird often includes links to products we write about. Our editorial choices are made independently; nonetheless, a purchase made through such a link can sometimes result in MyLittleBird receiving a commission on the sale, whether through a retailer, an online store or Amazon.com.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Devil or Angel?

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Keeping White Shirts White

From left to right, bright white shirts from Cos Stores, Ganni at Farfetch and Everlane.

HERE AT MyLittleBird, we’ve been talking about great white T-shirts for a while now.  And no doubt we’ll revisit the subject this spring. But in the meantime we’ve zeroed in on another staple —white button-downs. It so happens that this classic has also been on the radar of another site—Get in the Groove. And they brought up a good question: How do you care for these white sparklers so they stay that way?

We just hate it when our favorite white shirts start to yellow, go gray, get oily stains around the cuffs or perspiration stains around the collar. So, we asked the experts: Lorraine Muir from the textile testing and research services of the Drycleaning & Laundry Institute (DLI) and Brian Sansoni, vice president of the American Cleaning Institute (ACI). Here are their tips on how to wash and dry your shirts and the dos and don’ts of bleach.

 

We Asked, They Answered

MLB: Should you wash your white cotton shirts rather than dry clean them? Why?

LM: White cotton shirts stay whiter when washed.  Cotton absorbs impurities and soils from other garments that are in the drycleaning load, and this can cause the white to dull.

 

MLB: Can you wash them with other white laundry or by themselves?

LM: They can be washed with other white clothes. It’s just not a good idea to wash white cotton shirts with towels because lint might transfer to the shirts.  Also, towels get washed and dried on higher temperatures than shirts.

 

MLB: How much detergent should you use and what temperature should you wash them at? Should you use a detergent with a whitening agent — any one you recommend?

LM: Use the amount of detergent recommended by the equipment manufacturer.  Most detergents have some sort of whitening agent in them.

BS: Just about any detergent will get your shirts clean. There are detergents available that have optical brighteners, which attach to fabrics to create a whitening or brightening effect when exposed to daylight. Follow the directions on the container for the proper amount of detergent and the directions on the garment for recommended water temperature to launder your shirt.

 

MLB: Should you use bleach, too?

LM: Optical brighteners used in most white fabrics can be destroyed by using bleach.

BS: This is where you really need to pay attention to the garment label to see if it’s safe to add bleach when laundering this item. This symbol guide can help you along.

 

MLB: Does lycra or any kind of stretch in a shirt affect the way it is cleaned? Does an all-cotton shirt come out in the wash better?

LM: Shrinkage is a big problem when cotton is blended with a stretch fiber.  The lower the heat  the better when it comes to washing and tumble drying.  It is difficult to achieve a smooth wrinkle-free finish in the stretch blends.

 

MLB:  My biggest problem with white shirts is that they get brown around the collar, neckline. How do you get those stains out?

LM: That stain around the collar is a combination of oils and perspiration, hair and skin solutions.  If you see discoloration before laundering, pretreat with a stain removal agent. If you notice a stain after  laundering, do not tumble dry as the heat will set the stain, making it more difficult to remove.  Mild bleaches, such as sodium perborate or hydrogen peroxide, may help remove stains on the collar but improper use of bleach can lead to dulling or yellowing and cause fabric degradation. A good white cotton shirt or blouse can benefit from professional care. The dry cleaner has solutions unavailable to the consumer that remove collar stains without damaging the color or fabric.

BS: ACI’s stain guide has some useful tips, including for attacking collar stains: 1. Pretreat with prewash stain remover, liquid laundry detergent or paste of powder detergent and water. 2. Let soak in. 3. Launder as normal.

 

MLB:  Finally, how should you dry them? Hang them rather than using the dryer?

LM: Dry on the lowest temperature possible or hang them to dry.  Heat can also damage the optical brightener in white fabric and cause dinginess or yellowing.

BS: It’s perfectly fine to line-dry the shirts. If you put them in the dryer, make sure you don’t over-dry them or use excessive heat. You don’t want that beautiful shirt to shrink!

 

Seven Shirt Picks

 

LEFT: LittleBird Nancy had this to say about Foxcroft’s Paityn Non-Iron Cotton Shirt: “I toss mine in the dryer. If I pull it out immediately after, it’s pretty wrinkle-free. And the finish is nicer than when it’s just hung to dry.” $49, Nordstrom. RIGHT: As advertised, Brooks Brothers’ Non Iron Tailored Fit Dress Shirt looks crisp and ready for action after a wash-dry cycle.  Two for $165, Brooks Brothers.

 

LEFT: This extra-long oxford Boyfriend Shirt pairs perfectly with skinny pants or jeans. I have the same style in linen, and it’s constantly in rotation. $175, Ann Mashburn. RIGHT: I’m a Theory fan. Yeah, I know it’s expensive, but the clothing lasts and the fit doesn’t ever fail. Compare it to Prada, and you’ve got a bargain. This Tenia Cotton Blend Blouse is $245 at Nordstrom.

Danish design brand Ganni tweaks the button-down style with its Scallop Trim Shirt. Verdict: Cute, whether worn tucked in or out. $136, Farfetch.

LEFT: For more of a flirty take on the classic, three-quarter sleeves, neckline and curved hemline add a femme touch to this Cos Stores’ Buttoned Blouse. $89. RIGHT: You can’t beat the price point or the feel and durability of the fabric on Everlane’s Relaxed Poplin Shirt. $55, Everlane.

—Janet Kelly

 

MyLittleBird often includes links to products we write about. Our editorial choices are made independently; nonetheless, a purchase made through such a link can sometimes result in MyLittleBird receiving a commission on the sale, whether through a retailer, an online store or Amazon.com.

Technology’s Dark Side

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LAST NIGHT, home alone eating applesauce and watching a movie on Netflix, suddenly everything went black. My first thought was that I had died, but because I was still holding the dish of applesauce I thought probably not. Next guess: the power was out, which was odd since it was a beautiful night. No rain, wind or disturbances of any kind.

Remembering that blind people go out to the market or a job or take the subway or do anything at all aided only by a stick, I cautiously groped my way around the furniture to the nearest box of matches and lit a candle. Then I lit some more and, grumpily accepting that I wouldn’t find out how the movie ended, at least not right away, went to bed. A few hours later, an intense beeping woke me. The power was still out, but our bedroom plug-in carbon monoxide detector was screaming for me to get out of the house!, flashing “GAS, GAS, GAS, GAS,” over and over in bright red neon. No dummy, I got out.

There I was, standing in my driveway in the pitch-black outdoors at one in the morning with a furiously beeping carbon monoxide detector on my hands. My cell phone was in my bathrobe pocket, so I called my husband somewhere where it was two hours earlier. He assured me there was no gas in the house, that the thing was probably beeping because of the power outage, and that I should go back to bed. I wrapped the beeping thing in a blanket and left it inside my car, then trudged up the stairs to die peacefully in my sleep.

This morning the power was back on, and I was alive. The digital clocks on all the appliances were flashing “RESET.” When I opened my refrigerator, it beeped and flashed the words “Power Outage” in case I hadn’t noticed. Our land-line telephone with built-in voicemail intoned, Your outgoing message has been erased, “Your outgoing message has been erased,” “Your outgoing message has been erased.”

A call to Maine Central Power revealed that an animal—no mention of species—had come in contact with some wires at a power sub-station, causing a shortage that plummeted four adjacent towns (total pop., approx. 37,000) into darkness for eight hours. So much for all that technology.

—Andrea Rouda

Andrea Rouda blogs at The Daily Droid.

Trendlet: Shoe Buckles

FEET ARE having all the fun, adornment-wise. This season, along with all the jaunty big bows we saw in spring, buckles are staging a comeback. In the 17tth century, they replaced ties on shoes, but we’re talking more recent developments. Like in 1967 when Catherine Deneuve wore Roger Vivier’s prim black leather pumps with large square silver buckles in the Luis Buñuel movie “Belle de Jour.” The shoe became very popular, thanks to the attention of fashion icons like Jackie Kennedy Onassis. Bruno Frisoni (who succeeded Vivier) said that he kept the virgin/vixen duality of Ms. Deneuve’s character in mind when designing subsequent styles. He wanted the shoe to look proper but with a twist. The buckle remains a signature for the brand today, which sells footwear from booties to sneakers in a range of fabrics and whimsical embellishments.

Think buckles are old-school? Not to quintessential sole sister Carrie (aka Sarah Jessica Parker). In the 2008 “Sex and the City” movie,” Big proposes to her with a blue satin rhinestone-buckled Manolo Blahnik Hangisi pump. And the Wall Street Journal reports that Blahnik has just introduced a new mini Hangisi collection in designs that pay tribute to New York City streets. Not so prim.

Although an ultra-swanky pair of Manolos or Viviers can cost almost as much as an engagement ring, there are many less spendy options for buckled shoes, including square-, pointed- or round-toe flats, mules, boots and heels of all heights and shapes. Here are a dozen in all price ranges.

 

—Janet Kelly

 

 

 

 

 

LEFT: Multiple straps and a block heel on Carel’s Kina Mary Jane pumps call to mind the look of a 1920s dancing shoe style. Beige patent leather makes it look fresh and modern. $398, Farfetch.

RIGHT: In another instance of yin and yang, a brilliant bejeweled buckle adorns these Hangisi Denim Flats from Manolo Blahnik. $955, Saks Fifth Avenue.

LEFT: Admittedly, not much of a buckle here. Still Madewell’s Delilah Mary Jane Pump’s old-school style reads new, thanks to the suede fabric and burgundy shade. $98, Nordstrom.

MIDDLE: The roomy toe area on Butter Shoes’ Cloud Square Toe Flat makes it comfy for all-day running around. Not as flat as it looks, a hidden wedge provides some lift. $315, Simply Soles.

RIGHT: Think sexy and prim at the same time, like Bruno Frisoni. Belle Vivier Suede Pumps, $650, Neiman Marcus.

 

Narrow feet a concern? Buckle up with Zara Ballet Flats with Strap, which adjust to skinnier feet. $45.90, Zara.

 

 

 

 

LEFT: If these boots feel a little loose, adjust them to be just right with four not merely ornamental studded buckle straps. The Elani Waterproof Moto Boot from Blondo is $179.95 at Nordstrom.

RIGHT: One buckle is not enough for Balenciaga’s Alexander Wang. His moto Cutout Buckle Boot comes with wraparound ankle and vamp straps and inexplicably, side cutouts. $1,490, Nordstrom.

LEFT: Korean footwear brand Yuul Yie’s  Buckle-Detailed Velvet Mules are made from pilled velvet and feature an arty buckle detail set with a faux pearl embellishment. Show them off with ankle-baring hemlines. $310, Moda Operandi.

RIGHT: If you’re not so sure about buckles, keep the investment on the low side with pastel gray Buckle Flat Shoes. $39.99, Mango.

 

LEFT: Attico Italian designers Gilda Ambrosio and Giorgia Tordini are known for their use of rich colors and materials. On these color-block Buckle Strap Mules with a cone heel, the statement-scale, retro buckle gives a great big tweak to the classic Mary Jane. $700, Farfetch.

RIGHT: Buckles or bows? With Miu Miu Bow Buckled Leather Flats, no need to decide. Shown on the fall 2018 runway, these shoes have both, plus a zipper. $790, Matches Fashion.

 

MyLittleBird often includes links to products we write about. Our editorial choices are made independently; nonetheless, a purchase made through such a link can sometimes result in MyLittleBird receiving a commission on the sale, whether through a retailer, an online store or Amazon.com.

 

 

 

‘You’re Going to Die’: A Daily Reminder

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ACCORDING TO a Bhutanese folk saying, “To be a happy person, one must contemplate death five times a day.” Taking that idea and running with it, an app called WeCroak sends you random messages throughout the day in the form of quotes from famous people reminding you that death is inevitable and could come at any time. (Gee, thanks.)

Bhutan, the tiny South Asian kingdom tucked in the Eastern Himalayans, is best known for its innovative policy of “Gross National Happiness.” Conventional wisdom says it’s a place where contentment reigns, and was long considered the happiest country on Earth until recently when it fell off the Forbes Top Ten list. (Finland is now Number 1). No doubt the Bhutanese are certainly happier than most Americans, especially people living in certain parts of Chicago, or Philly, or Flint, Michigan. Still, if you ask me, that whole “thinking about death” thing sounds like a major downer. So, how happy are those Bhutanese, really? Here are a few pertinent facts about the place. Draw your own conclusions.

1. The first nation to ban all tobacco use, smoking anywhere in Bhutan is against the law. 
2. Homosexuality is illegal. Same-sex sexual acts, even when consensual and done in private, are punishable by a prison sentence of between one month to less than one year.
3. Polygamy, while not common, is legal.
4. According to 2016 data from the World Bank, Bhutan’s citizens have a life expectancy of 70.2 years. (69.9 for males and 70.5 for females)

While I completely applaud the wisdom of facing my own mortality, if I could learn what Jane Fonda (80), Clint Eastwood (88), Mel Brooks (92), Tony Bennett (92), George H. W. Bush (94), Betty White (96), Doris Day (96) Olivia de Havilland (102) and Herman Wouk (103) contemplate five times a day, I’d definitely do that.

—Andrea Rouda

Andrea Rouda blogs at The Daily Droid.